why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize