I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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