I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
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friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
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Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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