how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
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