no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize