I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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