There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
my being single is dangerous.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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