did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Randomize