why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
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He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
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Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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