Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
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It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
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Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
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