does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
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stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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