Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
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She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
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I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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