Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize