I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
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