Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
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I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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