I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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