You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
She's like a pop up book from hell.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Randomize