just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
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