You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
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Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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