What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Randomize