So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
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His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
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Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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