kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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