i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
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