Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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