...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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