This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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