happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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