Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize