Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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