It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
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Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
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People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
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