All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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