Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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