I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize