Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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