OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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