He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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