If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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