scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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