Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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