While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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