what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
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I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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