Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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