I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize