YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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