My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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