Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
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Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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