Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Pooping to opera.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize