So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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