i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
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