I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
birth control should be required to get into college
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
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